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mmoa_writes at 10:48pm on 15/03/2007
mmoa_writes at 10:48pm on 15/03/2007This is going to sound terribly dramatic but...
If I've been rather short with anyone through this week, I'm really sorry: I haven't been feeling that great as you can probably tell, oddly depressed, the usual feelings of self-loathing, doubt and just plain weariness (oddly, because I can't quite placed what triggered it off, but then, when have I ever been able to, heh...) but it's nothing to do with anyone else, just one of those things. And hormones, I suppose. And the fact that I am just a moody cow, lol.
On the plus side, I have been able to scan in the rest of my comics. I am also going to this years 'UK webcomix thing' on Saturday (http://ukwebcomixthing.co.uk/) which should be fun.
If I've been rather short with anyone through this week, I'm really sorry: I haven't been feeling that great as you can probably tell, oddly depressed, the usual feelings of self-loathing, doubt and just plain weariness (oddly, because I can't quite placed what triggered it off, but then, when have I ever been able to, heh...) but it's nothing to do with anyone else, just one of those things. And hormones, I suppose. And the fact that I am just a moody cow, lol.
On the plus side, I have been able to scan in the rest of my comics. I am also going to this years 'UK webcomix thing' on Saturday (http://ukwebcomixthing.co.uk/) which should be fun.
self-loathing, doubt
ah, i know it well. i do it, too. i don't recommend it. (yeah, good advice for myself.) no, you're not a "moody cow". need to accept and embrace these feelings, Sappho. that's what i find so hard, and why i stay stuck when i do. and you need to act, although i know how hard that is to do.
what's your moniker and such at the ukwebcomixthing? want to see your stuff there.
thanks.
-- Jan
Re: self-loathing, doubt
let's try again ...
i'm afraid my last comment was less than helpful, being more lecture than advice. i was trying to empathize, but that in itself is presumptuous. i don't know how you feel. it's different. i've been so depressed as to be "frozen" in place.
i think as artist you have a great gift, helping with that. i try to find the same during code time, but i don't always succeed, partly because i don't get as much as i'd like. that is, if all there is when you're working with brush or pen or words are the strokes, the scribing, the sentences, then, what's more real, the work or your mood? for me, if i get into that space rather than coasting aimlessly, the code talks to me, makes me feel good.
it may seem you're being hypercritical when you work, but, well, maybe you're not. maybe that's just the art talking to itself through you. i often think computer programs become what they want to be, and the less present and presence the programmer has, the better the result.
Re: let's try again ...